why tiki ti, why?

So I had dinner with Summer the other night. We met for drinks and dinner at Colombo's in Eagle Rock. It is a kooky old school steak house with paintings of naked ladies on the walls. You can see the appeal already. Summer was stuck in traffic so I was one up on her when she arrived. We sat down for dinner and began the usual dissection of how weird life is and our lives in particular. After a good girly dinner of salads and appetizer (and a 1/2 carafe of wine, nice hustle Summer) we wrapped it up and headed home to our individual estates to collapse into bed. OR NOT! By now I had a nice lube going and I wasnt feeling like heading home quite yet. (Summer is going to kill me). I took Sunset home for some site seeing. I saw the Tiki Ti!

http://www.tiki-ti.com/

If there is a parking spot out front, I am going in, I think to myself. I had my camera and decided this would be a great photo op. Of course the parking gods were on my side (or not). I went in and knew I was in trouble. It is a tiny place, 12 stools. And people were packed in. The air was thick with smoke. You can actually smoke there! I sidled up to the bar and tried to decide what to order. I asked the bartender (who looks like he just graduated from high school) what is the specialty? A "Rays steak" he says. It is loud in there mind you, but I nod and he begins the complicated process. A drink is placed in front of me and I pull out the card. Not so much. Cash only. I have to hustle to the Mexican joint next door and get cash. When I return, my drink is right were I left it. I look at my neighboring patrons suspiciously. Oh well. Sip. Delish! There is lots of shouting Toro Toro! I dont know why. I shout too. Everyone around me is talking to me at once and I am taking their pictures. There is another guy there with an ancient polaroid and he starts snapping away too. I finish my first drink. I learn that drink is not called "Rays steak" its called a "Mistake". Uh Huh. Next is the wheel of drinks where you spin the wheel and thats what you get. I ended up with a Brazilian culo, I think. Let me comment that all of the drinks taste pretty much the same. Rum Rum and more rum! But it was a party. Everyone loves a girl with a camera. It dawns on me that I need to pee. I head through the bamboo curtain into the bathroom. This is were we have the problem. The bathroom is narrow. I shut the door and set my purse on the floor (it looked clean). I do my business, wash my hands and decide to reapply gloss. I lean over into my purse, way over. I am wearing 4" platforms. I lose my balance and crack my head on the sink cabinet. I see stars. Little tiki stars with hula girls. DUDE! I straighten up and grip the sink. I am not going to barf. I reach back and check for blood. I am clear. I shake it off and head back out. My judgment might have been clouded before but now it was in a deep SF fog. Another drink. Lords knows why. There is lots of discussion about dirt bike riding (I have only been once), kicking heroin (never done it) and strangulation during sex (I take the 5th). I had to get out of there before it spiraled out of control. I said my goodbyes to all of my new best friends (again???)and dodged several offers for a ride to my car (we all know what THAT means) and headed home. I woke up the next day with a monster run hangover and the vague knowledge that I had given my number out to some Bulova salesman. Damn the rum!